17 January 2008

my sidekicks rebuttal.

A Rebuttal to Belles Slander

I am “The Sidekick”, and I want to shed some light on what actually happened the day we went shopping. First off, the glasses. It began simply enough, with us shouting at each other like we normally do. Mostly her saying I'm an asian failure. For some time, it has been an unspoken agreement between us (or so I thought), that no matter how many bitchy things I said to her, she would not do anything, because Belle is passive-aggressive; always has been. So, imagine my surprise when she vicious and barbarically attacks me, out of nowhere! No where my foot, you insulted my jacket. No one insults my jacket. Only I can insult my jacket. I admit, she had been threatening me with bodily harm for some time now, but I dismissed them as empty threats, as they usually were. Because I'm that nice, I don't want you limping and leaving blood all over the place after I'm finished with you. Not only does she attack me with a soda bottle (how uncouth!) my poor glasses fall off and break. So the screw came out. Woo. The frame came loose, and the lens fell out, in one piece thankfully. I now have half a pair of glasses. You look like John Lennon anyway. I spent the rest of the day looking like I just broke out of an insane asylum. So you mean there was no actual difference in your appearance, then. However, does she feel a speck or remorse? No, not a smidgeon, not even a pinch.

"Say you're sorry and it's entirely your fault!" "I'm sorry and it's entirely your fault." "YOUR FAULT." "YOUR FAULT." etc. etc. etc.

Now, the dress. I am no Yosemite Sam, no Daffy Duck, to tricked and connived by some cleverer animal. I got the dress because I liked it, and I need a dress for an upcoming event. I was initially willing to lend the dress out, but not anymore. The blurry pictures will be all of it you’ll get.

Psh. You will lend it to me and you already said you forgave me.

o now that’s I’ve had my say; I bid you adieu. Perhaps, if I am deemed worthy, I will be back. But, for now remember: I am no ones sidekick.

Except mine. =D

(ok, i'm sorry about the italicized writing. But really. You love me anyway. for new readers: see post before this, i guess? abigail, my best friend, is the unitalicized. )